1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car withsunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars.See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguiseyour voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask ifthey want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it"IN".
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Onceeveryone has gotten over their caffeine addictions,switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "forsmuggling diamonds".
7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance withthe prophecy".
8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat -with a serious face.
11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
12. Sing along at the opera.
13. Put mosquito netting around your work area andplay tropical sounds all day at work.
14. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don'trhyme.
15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can'tattend their party because you're not in the mood.
16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestlingname, Rock Bottom.
17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! Iwon!"
18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards theparking lot yelling, "run for your lives, they're loose!!"
19. Tell your children over dinner "due to theeconomy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
20. And the final way to keep a healthy level ofinsanity . . . e-mail this to someone to make them smile and laugh. Its called therapy.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity!
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car withsunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars.See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguiseyour voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask ifthey want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it"IN".
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Onceeveryone has gotten over their caffeine addictions,switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "forsmuggling diamonds".
7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance withthe prophecy".
8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat -with a serious face.
11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
12. Sing along at the opera.
13. Put mosquito netting around your work area andplay tropical sounds all day at work.
14. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don'trhyme.
15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can'tattend their party because you're not in the mood.
16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestlingname, Rock Bottom.
17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! Iwon!"
18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards theparking lot yelling, "run for your lives, they're loose!!"
19. Tell your children over dinner "due to theeconomy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
20. And the final way to keep a healthy level ofinsanity . . . e-mail this to someone to make them smile and laugh. Its called therapy.
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